A Thursday List


1. I’m grumpy.

2. I wish I was at home in sweatpants

3. I ate an entire bag of Twizzlers. By myself. And I’m not sorry.

4. I’m craving peanut butter so bad that I’d probably go to desperate measures just to get some right now. I’d probably shave my head if someone told me a 5 gallon bucket of peanut butter would appear at my feet. Then I’d put a swimsuit on and I’d dive head first into that bucket and I’d lick it clean.

5. Okay, maybe not. But it sounded good for a second.

6. I hear we’re supposed to get an inch or two of snow overnight. When my coworker told me this dreadful news, I went into immediate mourning. I’m talking the full on wailing and gnashing of teeth. All I want is to be able to wear shorts more than two days in a row and to sweat. Is that too much to ask for?

7. Christin and I have a race Saturday morning. I feel like I’ll need an oxygen tank at the finish line. And a gurney to carry me out. I’m so out of shape.

8. I ran last night and after one mile, I had to be resurrected from the dead. It could have been the fact that I ate a fudge dipped ice cream cone right before I went. Or it could’ve been my allergies that are causing me to wheeze. But either way, I’m not ready for Saturday.

9. I’m ready to hit up the sale barn. And not for the cattle, if you catch my drift.

10. My mom made a blackberry cobbler last night. I begged her not to, but she insisted that my dad really wanted one. I think I’ll have to get a hotel until the cobbler is gone because otherwise, that thing wont stand a chance tonight.


Your Friend with the Exponentially Growing Waistline


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